I'm sneezing uncontrollably
I've gone through two boxes of tissues since Saturday
I'm continuously rubbing the roof of my mouth with my tongue. I even wake up to find myself at it
I've now got blisters on the roof of my mouth
My forehead, nose, lips, cheeks, neck, ears and hair are itchy.
My fingernails are itchy
I want to die
I want a razor blade.
There can be only one reason.
It's HAYFEVER SEASON!!!!!
AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Ode On A Tissue:
Plaintive tissue, so serene.
Any minute now you'll be...
Sorry, the rest of the Ode On A Tissue has been smudged by the Sneeze On A Tissue.
More creative lines about my affliction
There was a young lady from Huntingdale
That had a nose as big as a whale
When she did sneeze
They all felt the breeze
Was less of a wind than a gale
There was a young lady from Perth
Who ummmm let's see
The only thing that rhymes with Perth is smurf, so we'll just stick with the first limerick. Maybe I should try some Haiku?
A sneeze in the arch
Way of life beckons to my
Indecent calling
I never mentioned it would be good Haiku
From the psychiatrist's couch.
Yes, it's my mother's fault.
Here are five reasons why.
- She was a teenage mother (ie: at 16 barely able to look after herself let alone a baby)
- She smoked throughout her pregnancy
- She smoked throughout my childhood
- She smoked in the car ( I think smoking in the car is child abuse)
- As an asthmatic herself, she has crappy genes
Have a great day. I'm off to take an antihistamine and head back to bed.
Except, I have to go shopping for a new dress for Angriest's upcoming nuptials. Hmmmm difficult decision
